Day 44: The Character game

Maybe I should tell her that I like being in her presence. But what if she doesn’t respond acceptingly. No rather let me not say nothing. But I really like being in her presence. No,no,no stop it. I realise that I have just created the character of self doubt. Ok I will stop. Do not participate in this character. But what about if we start taking walks together, I like taking walks, maybe she will also like taking walks. There are so many places where we can take walks together. Ok – Lets do that- Yes I like this idea. Wait a minute – I have just created another character within myself – I created the controlling character that is using walks as a means to define this relationship. Ok stop stop – Do not participate in these thoughts these thoughts are just creating more and more characters within and as myself – So stop – Do not participate in these characters. There must be a way that one can snap out of these thoughts and just not participate in these thoughts. I’ve seen that I am good at seeing other people problems and points where they are not in alignment, maybe I’ll work with that because I am good at this and I can …wait a minute I have just walked into my next character again. This character is a character of self granduer in making myself more than others. Wtf, how many characters do I have lined up. How do we get out these characters we have created?

In our participation within and as our thoughts we are continuously putting on different suites of different characters – When we accept and allow these thoughts we take on the thought as though it is real – we become the manifestation of this character that we had created within and as our minds and through this we believe that we are the character as we had accepted the thought that brought the character here as an expression of ourselves to be real. We thus believe we are this character and walk and act out the design for what the character stands – We will walk this design until we had realised that the thought was not real and then we get a moment to snap out of this character that we had created and believed that we were ourselves.

All of us are walking around like zombies – following the thoughts in our minds and putting on the suites of the characters as our minds guide us to the next suite to wear and the next and the next. Yet all this time we are trapped within and as our mind were we are trying to live out the thoughts as characters that come up within and as ourselves. We fight for the survival of our characters as ‘it is mine’, ‘it is who I know myself as’ and ‘nothing you can say or do will change that’ is the backchat that arises when the suite as characters are challenged within and as self.

We have moments of opportunities to dent our characters to allow ourselves and another as ourselves to stop living as characters and to allow ourselves to take a breath and be here within and as the moment that is here. 


For context, also read:
Day 79: Stepping out of Character - Bernard Poolman
Day 79: Kill the Buddha - He's Just a Character, Part 3- Lindsay Craver
Day 79. I'm Nothing But a Character - Malin Gunilla
Day 22 - Me as the Main Character within the Cinema of my Mind - Rozelle de Lange

My Life as a Character - Overview - Day 79- Maya Harel